My plan was to announce that, a year after coming up with the hare-brained idea, my first children’s book—Joy’s World—is finally coming to market. I dusted off my Turkish, made a little video in the car as the snow came down all around me, and then got choked up.
I was trying to say I wrote this book for my daughter who is already not remembering—of course I said it wrong in Turkish three times, and I don’t think even in the end I got it out correctly. And that’s not even how we’d say it in English—we’d say she’s starting to forget, no? But that’s the sort of thing that happens when you’re back-translating in your head...
I barreled onward, explaining I’d written the book to help my daughter remember Turkey and our life there. And then I forgot some critical things like where to buy it, what the story is about, and who might like it. Let’s just say it wasn’t my best effort at marketing.
But then I turned on the car because I didn’t want to be late, started driving to pick up said daughter, and began to cry for real.
She isn’t remembering.
She isn’t remembering Turkish. She isn’t remembering our friends. She isn’t remembering key events and what I thought were core memories.
She’s forgetting Turkey…while I can’t forget.
I can’t forget the kindness of the people, and the inexpressible impotence of waiting on an uncaring government to decide whether or not you can keep your daughter. I can’t forget the pink chair where I became a mother, and the way it felt when the immigration officer said Joy couldn’t leave the country.
I can’t forget a thousand Turkish breakfasts at our favorite restaurant, how the waiters would pluck Joy out of my arms and entertain her while we ate, and how so many of our neighbors changed their mind about adoption because the Queen of the Neighborhood walked along charming them all.
I can’t forget the dread of going to that courthouse, where nothing ever went right, until it all, finally—miraculously—did.
I can’t forget the dozens of friends and family who crossed the world to be with us, to bring us bacon and syrup and presence; who let us lead them all over creation, forget to feed them, and leave long conversations untranslated.
I can’t forget the people in our neighborhood. How much I loved them, and how crazy they drove me, and how it felt to live under a microscope all the time, and how much I longed to be understood—and for them to truly understand.
I can’t forget how much I ached for home—and yet here I am. Here we are. And I’m thankful beyond words.
But my daughter is forgetting.
For some reason the verses that come to mind in this moment are Lamentations 2:22-23:
Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.
Maybe these verses come to me because, in remembering Turkey, the essence of what I remember is this: His compassions are ever-new, His faithfulness is great, and even when He intentionally placed us in the fire—the fact that He stood beside us during every single momentary eternity while we burned was the reason we were not consumed.
My daughter will forget Turkey, and that’s okay—but every time I read her this book I’ll be attempting to remind her (and myself) of the words of life that echo throughout the story. Because of His great love.
About Joy’s World Bilingual Books for Children
The Joy’s World books are inspired by my bilingual, language-loving, third-culture kid, Joy. She was born in Istanbul, Turkey, and didn’t set foot in another country until she was almost four years old. According to her, she speaks “all the languages,” but if you were to test her, she’d be most fluent in English and Turkish. Although she’s just started Spanish immersion preschool, so I’m going to have to start calling her trilingual pretty soon.
This book series is for her, and for all the other bi- and multilingual children like her, growing up around the world, in and out of their passport countries. It’s for kids who love languages and cultures, and for the parents who want them to know more about this beautiful world they’re growing up in.
Joy’s World is currently being printed in hardcover and softcover, and will be shipped in late-April. You can pre-order at jodicowlesbooks.com—and if you pre-order, there’s a special offer.
If you’re in Boise, don’t pay for shipping, just send me a message and I’ll hand deliver when they arrive.
If you’re international, ebooks will be available soon.
If you’re interested in any of the other language combinations, stay tuned! Russian/Turkish just finished and Spanish/Turkish is up next!
Jodi - we need 1 paperback copy. Let me know when /how I should pay for this. Thank you❤️
So much emotion and memories even for me in reading that entry! Memories are sometimes wonderful and sometimes tearful....I've had a few myself as I think back on life a year ago. I had so much love poured on me while so much pain in watching John drift away. I'm almost more tearful now than the first months after he was gone. Go figure!
Anyway, I want a book, but there isn't an option to preorder without paying shipping........let me know how to proceed! ~ love you!!